i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
