it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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