I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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