He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Randomize
