god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
