guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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