How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize