Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
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