As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
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he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
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and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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