and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize