I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
