god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
