Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
