i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
