i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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