Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
