This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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