I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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