please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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