return my video game
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
