32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
