my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
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