Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Come share oat with me in your robe
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.