I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.