u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I didn't notice because vodka
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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