She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I'm getting married
To pizza
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
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