I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Ladies don't puke and tell
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize