i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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