we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Randomize
