remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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