her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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