is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
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