I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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