4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
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I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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