6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
You did what with his pubic hair?
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