She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize