ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
