I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
