A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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