he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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