sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
We had to coat check the pizza.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
