I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
