My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
