No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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