We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
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