ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
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