shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
