I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Randomize
