I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
