You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
