Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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