so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize