1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
